WILL THE REAL ME STAND UP?

Ever feel like a two-face? Acting one way in front of strangers and totally different when at home? We may not be aware of it. We may deny it, but we all have many sides to our selves. We may think that we are an unchanging, constant persona, but actually we have continously shape-shifting, multiple versions of ourselves.

A psychologically healthy person will be able to make smooth transitions between one scenario and the next by making seemless and slight adjustments in the areas of communication, including their posture, tone of voice, words used, and eye contact. For example, we would behave very differently when we are in a business meeting than at a birthday party with our children. To highlight this, think of what it would look like if someone did not make these adjustments, like the Terminator buying shoes - a pretty awkward and comical scenario. we find this to be adaptive and at times self-serving.

Granted, extreme shifts in personality from one minute to the next can be problematic, and may signal a greater issue. But these minor shifts can be practical and necessary. It means that we are taking stock of our sitaution and calculating the adjustments to maximize our success.

Try paying attention to the different types of personas that you present based on your setting. Then try asking yourself, "Why?" Why would I act this way in front of the company boss? Why would I act that way with my spouse? They may help us understand our underlying motivations and values. What do the multiple versions of yourself say about you?